Oct 10, 2011

Simply ask

My husband through conversation invited his coworker to our church. He and his wife have now been coming faithfully the last 6 weeks and even joined a growth group! We bought new cell phones recently and invited the salesman. He and his girlfriend have now come to our church 3 weeks in a row! All we did was ask. Sometimes sharing your faith is as easy as asking "Do you have a home church ?".

Sep 27, 2011

Signs you are a new mom

1. You have made peace with the fact that nothing short of a barber's cape will keep you from getting spit up on your clothes.
2. You no longer wear earrings.
3. Your nails haven't had a good manicure since the baby arrived.
4. You haven't turned on your alarm clock in months.
5. Your adult conversations focus on poo.
6. The diaper bag is now your purse.
7. Your memory card is always full.
8. Your living room is now full of baby equipment.
9. Eating a meal uninterupted is a luxury.
10. Your hair is a mess but your heart is full.


How is it that those we love most deeply, who even share DNA with us, can cut us the deepest? I learned the hard way a long time ago that people come into your lives for a season. Someone I love has chosen to walk away from our family. It hurts me that this person is hurting not only me but all my family members as well. I know the mistake is huge and yet there is nothing I can do in my power to stop it. At times I want to yell and others simply cry. I long for connection and when I reach for it, I am iced out. I thought family was forever- isn't that what all the cards say? My guess is that after some time has passed this person will come back like the prodigal who lost his way. But what about all the things in between the departure and the homecoming? Moments my son is having he will never have again. Memories being made without that person's presence. Can you get over a cut this deep? Is it possible to close a chapter on a loved one and move on? I don't think so. I think my only option is that of the prodigal son's father. Pray every day for the homecoming and when it happens stretch out my arms in a welcoming embrace.

Jun 19, 2011

My new normal

Being a mother has changed me from the inside out, literally. Ten full months of anticipation culminated with a hearty cry from within the operating room at Cox hospital. Noah was born emergency cesarean because of his dropping heart rate. His head was positioned on top of my pelvic bone and labor was causing him distress. To God be all the glory, my son came out perfectly healthy. As a bonus, he is also incredibly handsome with a full head of hair (even on his ears), such a manly man. His arrival has literally turned our worlds upside down. I sleep less, a lot less. Travel anywhere feels like packing for a two week vacation. Things I thought were easy before, like taking a shower or cooking dinner, have now become quite a task. But I also smile more, a lot more. And I would rather be home rocking my baby than on any other adventure out there. His mere presence delights me. This wonder boy is all mine and when he smiles, I am enchanted. He knows my voice. He turns his head to watch me from across the room. He feels safe enough to fall asleep in my arms. I am in awe of him and the gift that he is. I am humbled to be his mom. Most days I am covered in spit up and drool and I am so thankful for the reason why. My new normal is a constant state of awe. I am in awe of all the ways Noah is growing and learning. I am in awe that my Maker would choose me to be his mother. I am in awe of how much my God must delight in my presence too. After all, I am His little girl.

Mar 19, 2011

Having a baby!

May 2000, I was facing high school graduation and creating my self-made time line for the future. Let's see, first on the list move out , right -away , make that 2 years later. Graduate college by 2005 , make that 2007. Get married by the time I am 22, actually 26. Have a baby by the time I am 25, make that 29. As you can see my plans, have never been on God's timeline. His way was longer, much longer, and better, yes much, much better. My little girl dreams of having a baby are finally coming to fruition. I remember praying last summer that the Lord would allow us to conceive a child, if it was His will. I was skeptical as I prayed because I knew that the Lord rarely gives me things in the timing I ask him for them. But in July, he answered our prayers exactly how we prayed them. He gave us a little boy due April 18. All life comes from the Father and so as I carry this child I know that God has a bigger purpose for this life than even I can see. It is a very humbling experience to carry a child. Humbling, because that little life, still in the womb, represents hope for so many grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends. Humbling because as much as I love him and worry about him, I know my love is unmatched by how Jesus loves this child. As I sit here awed by a Creator who does all these things so miraculously, I cannot help but cry. He has allowed me to be a mother, and I am unworthy. My husband and I really only desire two things for this little guy, one that he love God with all his heart. And two, that he love others. With 4 weeks left we cannot wait to see his face and start this journey. I think the moment I hold him I will finally understand just a little bit more how much God loves me.